Johnny Be Good (…Bad & Ugly!)

Shameless, insightful, hilarious, truthful & taboo tales for men on a mission

How to Love and Support the Amazing Women in your Life

To celebrate International Women’s Day on March 8th, I’m doing my bit to help women by helping men to better understand women, so that we can all have better relationships and happier lives. Menstruation and menopause are things that women experience and men don’t, and therefore it can be difficult for some men to understand and relate to women around those things. That’s why I’ve asked Christine Page to write this guest blog to give us men some advice about this.

As a doctor and counsellor for over 40 years, I’ve been privileged to share intimacies with thousands of women around the world.

My husband Leland says: there’s nothing more beautiful in the Universe than a woman in her power. I’ve met many men who echo this sentiment; they just want to know how to serve the females in their lives. But when asked what they want, their women often reply: if you love me, you should know!

Please, men, don’t walk away or stop asking. Women embody a collective amnesia, following the suppression of all things feminine some 3500 years ago. This has left us with few role models today who express the qualities of a fully empowered and beautiful woman.

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Cancer – A Catalyst for Life Change?

When people discover that they have cancer, their initial reaction is typically “I’m going to die!” You can often see those same words written in the eyes of their loved ones; and it’s true. Life will never be the same again.

My take is not to hand power over, but to use a person’s energy to feel their experience, get the message that cancer wants to give them, and then allow cancer to pass. Thank the messenger for doing its job, then let it go.

It’s not about “think positive then everything will be okay.” It’s more about focusing on what you want to grow, rather than on what you want to go. How do you want life to be on the other side of this? What is life trying to tell you? What needs to die in order for you to be who you really are and live a truer life?

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10 Tips for the Maturing Male

Here are the top ten things that surprised me about ageing:

Flirting
I can get away with flirting, challenging, questioning, laying boundaries, being cheeky and giving compliments like I’d never imagined! I wonder whether it’s my tone, my attitude, or that I’m no longer seen as a horny young man just trying to get a leg over, or whether it’s my new found mature confidence. Whatever it is, I love it! I make eye contact, lower my voice, take my time, tilt my head downwards slightly while my eyeballs look up, and I raise an eyebrow – it works a treat!

Tip: Take a breath, take a chance, hold the space and play – lovingly.

Flossing
I thought my flossing technique had improved because I could feel more between my teeth. It turned out to be receding gums!

Tip: Take care of your gums and teeth, and go to the dentist to check for gum disease. Floss and brush twice a day and if you smoke – stop it!

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How to Cope with your Christmas Family Reunion

There are two types of people: those who enjoy the annual Christmas family gathering and those who don’t. For some people, Christmas with the family is more like a nightmare than a joyous reunion.

Unfortunately, we don’t all get along with every member of our family. Sometimes there’s outright hostility, but more often than not, it’s just an underlying, unspoken tension. What can you do? Often alcohol is used to numb the uncomfortable feelings and jollify, but it can cause more problems than it fixes because it loosens tongues, dissolves the polite civility and unshackles the underlying resentments.

The type of drama that ensues depends upon the family dynamics. At one end of the spectrum, everyone yells at each other and it feels like World War III has broken out. Another scenario resembles a schoolyard bully beating up the sensitive kids, or what’s more socially acceptable is the sensitive ‘victims’ passive-aggressively doing the ‘beating up’ through control and conversational minefields.

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MAN UP! How to grow from suffering in silence to connecting with confidence

BBC3 Online recently released a powerful four minute documentary called “It’s Tough Being A Man”. It’s about depression in men and how men stay silent about it.

I was happy to be one of the men filmed for this documentary because I strongly support the message that we need to change the culture of secrecy that exists around men’s mental health issues. I’ve had to deal with my own mental health issues, when I was younger, and I was able to draw on this experience for the documentary.

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From ‘Am I?’ To “I Am”

Do you remember learning to ride a bike?

I do. Mark Rogers from no. 25 taught me in our street, in front of all the neighbours. I remember the moment of panic as I suddenly realised that I was riding on my own, without stabilisers or Mark holding on to the back of my seat. I wobbled and nearly fell, not because I didn’t have the balance or skill, but because every thought in my panicked head began: ‘am I?’

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My Wings Got Singed On My Flight For Fame

Last month my best friends and I gathered around a TV set and watched ourselves die!

Not literally, but our egos took a bashing as our shadows were paraded on Channel 4’s Cutting Edge documentary ‘The Secret Life of The Pub’. We were asked to reveal what’s actually said by men when women are not in the room.

The show did well to demonstrate how ‘the media’ would have us view men. Although it was well edited for their audience, it did men few favours.

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My Wife Married a Ni**er!

Kenny D’Cruz shares how his honeymoon took an unexpected turn when he was racially abused in front of his new wife.

“Did I call you a liar? At least I’m not a ni**er and I work for a living!” was my Italian wife’s first real racist ‘attack’, behind my back, from the car rental man in a deserted Santorini Airport as we arrived around midnight for our honeymoon.

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